I walked up to the counter at the BBQ place wearing pajamas, a hobo hat, and tennis shoes, and plopped my elbows on the counter that reached just below my chest which made the little skinny girl who hadn’t eaten in three days feel even punier. Looking at the hostess with a reserved joy about finally gaining my appetite back I asked, "Can I place an order to go, please?" After sitting down and looking through the menu for that one thing I wanted, I ordered with my soft, sickly voice, “Can I have a Taphouse burger with Swiss cheese.. and bacon… and fries?” Let me inform you that the Taphouse burger without the bacon is already 1.2 lbs of meat. “And, can I get all the sauces on the side too?”
I pay the girl at the counter and she tells me it will be about ten minutes. I started filling the little sauce containers she gave me with all the sauces. I dab one, taste it with my finger, and squeeze it in until it made a farting noise. I farted some right onto her counter even. “I’m so sorry, I spilled some”. And she cleaned up after me.
Ten minutes later I was handed a giant bag with a giant Styrofoam box filled with a giant burger and a giant mass of fries. I walked out groggily dragging my feet and picking my wedgie. A real lady I am. Now, here I sit in my room, drinking my juice box, watching a girly movie, and eating a big fatty burger. I say this is how you get rid of strep throat.
