During bouts of joy I have been known yell out a hearty "I love everyone!" but when I write, another side of me will always come out. The full moon hits, and freckles here (that's me) will sit down at the computer and turn into an ugly wearwolf. A cynical, critical, cursin', spitin' wearwolf. It's rebellion to my general hippie dippie love for all the world. Sometimes it's funny, sometimes it's crass, and sometimes it's painfully transparent. The fact is, that this critic whoever-she-is inside of me has kept me from writing to anyone but myself.
It's time to get my hairy face out of the covers.
But... a BLOG? why a BLOG? blogs? please. since the internet was invented (thank you Al Gore) I've had it out for blogs. I rarely read them. And I like to rip on them a lot.
Weird how I don't like reading about someone else's every move. Usually I do like to hear about when you brush your teeth (that's a lie), and if your constipated today (that's not), but the concept of a blog makes me want to roll my eyes really big at everyone who has one (myself including. sheesh).
It's always seemed incredibly egocentric to me. I don't know why, though, because most of the people I know who do blog are very wonderful, non-egocentric people. They have things on their heart that they need to say.
They're people I love.
The title of my blog is 'off with the armor' because my writing has always been secretly folded between the binds of my journal. That sacred place only my eyes can go. It's safe. Occasionally my writing will be sent out in a heartfelt, sarcastic e-mail to my family. But I feel it's time for me to take off my armor. To make myself vulnerable to someone other than just myself.
Some things I've already shared. Some things are not incredibly heartfelt. Some are just thoughts. And some things are deeply personal straight from the pages of my journals.
Beings safe is not always a good way to grow.
Welcome to this process of the slow, and delicate removal of my armor.
