My story telling abilities are less than par today because I've been sick. Bare with me. I want to tell about how God truly want's us to live and enjoy life. That's the kind of God He is. And He will help provide for that.
My great friends Tessa and Dorian Richardson let me live in their home in the Gold Coast for a week while they were out of town. It was perfect timing, and a great, restful time for me to just be somewhere. Just be. Read. Watch a movie or two.
I'm just going to take a few seconds to update anyone who doesn't know about my downward spiraling life right now. At that point I was stuck in Chicago, my previous boss refused to pay me my $500 paycheck (and continues to), my oldest sister and her husband found out of some terrible complications with their precious 20 week old baby Jonan who was still in her belly at the time. My wonderful boyfriend and I broke up (on very good terms) a couple weeks previous. And the joyous car... the car trouble is the story of my life. My car has been broken down for almost an entire month now.
This one particular day I was staying at Dorian and Tessa's I had planned to go get myself a CTA pass and a Chicago Public Library card so I could get around to see some wonderful friends I had made plans with, and so I could read a few good books.
Stop 1: Buy my CTA pass. Stop 2: Stop at the bank and see how much money I have (or pennies). Stop 3: Library. Stop 4: Make use of my Starbucks gift card.
To make a long story short, I didn't have enough money for the CTA pass. I nearly got lost looking for a bank that doesn't exists (damn you google maps). I ended up at the wrong library- finding the correct one, it wasn't open yet. I knew where Starbucks was though, and that was the only thing that was going to right in this day.
"Give me a break, please God," I prayed as I walked away from the closed library.
As I reached the end of the giant line at Starbucks the nice man in front of me started making small talk about remembering when there were no cell phones, and "they know my drink here- I don't even have to say anything when I walk in." Not really in the talking mood, but I smiled and nodded.
We ended up creaming our coffees at the same time.
"So are you on lunch break? What's going on here?" There were a ton of high school kids walking around.
"Uh, I don't know. I'm not in high school." I responded.
"Lunch break for work?"
"Ha, not working right now."
"Oh... well, are you looking for a job?"
Doug introduced himself to me, handed me his business card, and offered me a job at his law firm. Whoa, God. I didn't quite believe what was happening. Doug even offered to give me a short term position.
I quickly ran back to the apartment and e mailed him as he had asked, and we decided to meet in an hour on his lunch break to talk more about this opportunity.
Well now, I'm not the secretary-at-a-law-firm type- but I could be for a couple of weeks.
I'm amazed at God. I was walking down the street praying, and the next interaction I had was one offering me a job! That was what I needed. That's only stuff you hear about in movies.
An hour later and I shnazzed myself up to look less like a dirty hippie, and more like a professional. Doug and I met at Quiznos and he offered to buy me a sandwich. Anything I wanted. Just not the smallest item.
We sat at the table and talked, Doug asked me some questions about my previous experiences until he opened it up to me to start asking questions, and when I did he was strangely vague. He couldn't quite give a job description as I had asked. Nothing was very specific, but I knew he had immediate needs, and long term needs. I also found that the only people working for him was him, and he works out of his home office.
I went back to the apartment after the two hours of talking really unsure about everything. God had seemed to put this out there for me in such an obvious way, and now I didn't know what to do because I was growing uncomfortable with it. I battled it all in my head. How can I just give up something God put there for me? If I think He placed that opportunity for me there, then won't he make sure I'm protected too? I prayed again for Him to help me decipher whether or not this was a good idea, because I was having trouble on my own.
What I finally realized, was that's why God gives us intuition, feelings, concerns. If we learn to exercise and trust those parts of us, that is learning to trust what God gave us. We are not always wrong. The thing I was praying for was already telling me what to do. It was telling me that I felt uncomfortable with this, that red flags were going up, and that for some strange reason I was wanting to avoid this man walking down the street. Even though I was certain God put that man there to offer me a job, I was more certain that it was probably not a good idea to be working for him in his home office by myself.
I was telling this to my sister Julie and her friend Katie as we were hanging out one night. I wondered why I was so certain that it was God putting that man there. Katie said, "Maybe it was so you could get a free lunch."
Free lunch. Of course! I had been eating toast, eggs, and oatmeal because it was all I had. Doug bought me a big meaty sub sandwich that filled me up much better than eggs had been doing. What a great blessing it was to be fed. God really is in everything. I am so certain of it.
Fast forward two days later. I asked Julie to see if there were any job openings in Champaign so I could make some money for a couple of months. What would be great? A job that I love. A job that knows I'm only going to be there for a couple of months so I don't feel like a terrible person when I quit. A place to live.
That seemed like too much to ask for, so of course I was willing to just settle with any job and a place to live.
But God doesn't want us to settle. And I know that because Julie called me that evening to tell me I already had a job at a Bakery in Champaign, and they know I'll only be there for a couple of months. I planned to take the train down to Champaign in two days to secure everything. To my great surprise everyone had two whole snow days when I got down, and I got welcomed into Champaign with lounging around playing games, painting, and watching movies. Of course I was asleep for half of it because I had limited energy, but I enjoyed every second. And here I thought I was going to be spending the week sick, by myself because everyone would be at work. This was much better.
Possibly the greatest part to this was that Julie's friends Katie and her husband Jeremy invited me to live in their extra bedroom in their house for a couple of months. This eliminates the stress of not knowing when I'll be out of Julie and Josh's one-bedroom home, and how I'm going to find a place to live in all this snow while I'm sick, not knowing my way around town very well yet.
Truly, everything that I was asking for had been provided for me, and actually, so much more than I had asked for had been provided. The easiest part about it was the peace that filled my heart about it. Comparing it to the uneasiness about Doug's offer helps me take comfort in knowing that my feelings are there so I can learn to trust them. God's probably not going to open his big God mouth and speak big audible God words to me. My feelings in this case were His way of speaking to me.
Soon I will have money to fix my car, and in just a couple of months I will be free to frolic in the mountains once again.
Despite my seemingly downward spiraling life, I can see that God wants me to live and enjoy life. And I will if He has anything to do with it, so I'm going to make sure He has everything to do with it.
